Warning: You may not like this post if you are already blessed with a child. So stop reading.
Your friend is pregnant. Okay! You are happy for her because by now you have accepted the fact that it is not coming easy for you.
Then, your husband’s friend had second child. SECOND! and you do not have even the first and then he is pissed off because of THIS news. NOW, you are devastated because even though you have acknowledge the infertility, THE GOOD NEWS still stings. Moreover because your partner STILL shuts himself off after such news.
Good news for them, not for you! Isn’t it? How can you explain the “not in 1 in 8” population IT ISN’T EASY TO GET THAT BFP (not even once).
I have A: acknowledged my infertility and A: Accepted it. I am not angry at myself. I do not cry over watching pregnant bellies. I am not even jealous of them. The only thought goes inside my head is – ‘One day for sure.’ It is just that it is taking time and I am waiting.
Result: Cancellation of FET transfer. EVERY SINGLE TIME.
Medicines: Tonnes of them.
Endometrium: Giving away due to high estrogen (probably) given for the damn lining to grow in the first place.
What I want: Break from all of this.
Reality: I HAVE TO GO THROUGH IT. NO MATTER WHAT.
Bank account: Depleting
LIFE MINUS THE IVF LIFE
Work: Not interested
- Lighting a scented candle from Bath and Body works or Vaporizing an Essential Oil
- Adult coloring book
- Netflix obsession: Gilmore Girls, Grace and Frankie, Riverdale, izombie, The Good Wife
- Smoothie with flax seeds and almonds
- Jaggery to keep up Hemoglobin
Songs: Unplugged collection in Amazon Prime Music
Pick of the Week:
I do not follow spirituality. I am not an atheist. I only believe there is a ‘creator’. I do not follow any one or the many idol form of God. I do not have any spiritual guru.
But all said, I listen to the ones which my heart says – Yes!
Thank you for reading if you have come till the end. See you soon. 🙂